Pictures 13 and 14 - Dumb Stress

Yesterday and today were so very busy. Since I had a meeting a church late on Wednesday evening, and Doug is still out of town, I thought it would be fun to have a sleep-over at Grandma's house Wed evening, so she could feed and put E to bed. Since I wanted to go up to my old work for a baby shower on Thurs at noon, and it's closer to get there from her house than mine, it seemed like it was all going to work out great. So on Wednesday, I think my stress started with packing up everything to take to mom's house. My clothes, his clothes. Make sure the diaper bag is packed. the dogs. their beds. their food. the baby shower gift. my camera. brought the computer to show mom some pictures but guess I could have left it at home. his bouncy seat. the bottle and milk so mom could feed him Wed night. Snapped a picture of the packed car for yesterday's picture! (Looks like E doesn't have any feet, his pants were kinda long). The meeting went until after 10 p.m.; I ran home to pump (sorry if that is gross to anyone, but that's reality) and get my cell phone charger, than back to mom's house. Didn't bring Maggie's crate, as it's way too big and heavy for me to get into the car and it wouldn't have fit anyway. Well, she just couldn't settle down, and whined and tried to wander around the bedroom all night! Around 2:30 a.m. I let her and Lucy out in the back yard, and when I brought them back into my bedroom, I barricaded her bed by placing whatever objects I could find in the room (my duffel bag, a folding chair, a basket, etc.) Didn't keep her from whining. So frustrating. Didn't trust her to be in the rest of the house on her own, as she can be mischevious and would probably find something to chew on, so couldn't kick her out of the bedroom. So on Thursday, I was feeling tired, cranky, and a little stressed from the night before. Timing for feeding E wasn't working out right, so I ended up nursing him in my car in the parking lot of work before going into the shower. After the shower, I was so tired and had a huge headache. Back to mom's house to feed him, he didn't want to eat (probably was feeling my tense self), or apparently take a nap, as he kept crying on mom as she so sweetly offered to watch him while I laid down. So we finally get back to our own house, and he is sound asleep in his carrier. As I laid down on the couch and got somewhat comfortable, thinking whew, I will take whatever rest I can get, I hear the familiar "crinkle crinkle" sound of one of toys hooked on the carrier. He's awake. Sigh. Pulled myself off the couch. Well, we managed to work out the rest of the evening, he and I, and I survived enough to sit down and write on the blog. There's a new show they keep advertising on TLC titled, "What I Hate About Me." To be honest, I hate that title, because it makes me start thinking about things I don't like about myself, and I really don't think those kinds of thoughts encourage the fruits of the Spirit! But today, I kept thinking, I hate how I get so stressed! A trait about myself that is so very hard to change. (There are times when I am not actually feeling stressed about a particular situation, but people in my life will comment that I need to "calm down," so apparently even non-stressed I still give out that vibe!) Everyone talks about how babies thrive on routine, which is totally true; however these past two days re-emphasized to me how I thrive on routine too! Pre-baby, yesterday and today's activities would have been nothing (it boils down to a church meeting and a baby shower; how difficult is that to handle?!) Having this little critter that depends entirely on me makes every task so much more...different. I hate to say "complicated" or "difficult," because it's not his fault that he needs to be fed, changed, etc. It's all just part of my new life now. I pray that I will continue to learn how to "go with the flow" a little easier, because this is only the beginning.....